And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
