You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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