you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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