College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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