i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
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