I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize