Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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