3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
