Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
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i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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