Well apparently he's into motor boating.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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