turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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