doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize