we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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