my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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