Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
