your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize