your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Randomize
