My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
