everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize