we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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