i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
