so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Randomize
