am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Never underestimate the power of titties
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