you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
this is an emotional support booty call
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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