OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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