My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
