So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
