Don't you send me to vm
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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