I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
