It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Randomize
