Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
PS: I just woke up from my shower
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
