3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize