i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
