yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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