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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  Tell me the dirtiest joke you know

  (1-907): View more from Alaska

  Sarah Palin

  (907): View more from Alaska

  god, I love you

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (206): View more from Washington

  My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.

  (415): View more from California

  Why?

  (206): View more from Washington

  Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?

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• (509): View more from Washington

  I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (440): View more from Ohio

  its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right

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• (818): View more from California

  Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport

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• (323): View more from California

  VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.

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• (224): View more from Illinois

  Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.

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• (518): View more from New York

  Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????

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