I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
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just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
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I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
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jump out the window naked night went bad
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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