No stitches, just platelets and will power
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
