yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
