And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Randomize
