Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize
