Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
