Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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