Texts From Last Night

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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during

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  (919): I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during http://tfl.nu/dav8
  Replies (21) Good night (3346) Bad night (524)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.

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  (904): i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina. http://tfl.nu/j0mi
  Replies (13) Good night (6160) Bad night (835)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  Oh yeah that.

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  (781): WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND? (339): Oh yeah that. http://tfl.nu/clil
  Replies (50) Good night (1969) Bad night (5232)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.

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  (717): Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie. http://tfl.nu/dgs6
  Replies (28) Good night (5036) Bad night (1096)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...

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  (208): I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows... http://tfl.nu/dubx
  Replies (260) Good night (2030) Bad night (40319)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes

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  (706): He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes http://tfl.nu/an5y
  Replies (4) Good night (3524) Bad night (685)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me

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  (847): as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me http://tfl.nu/nasi
  Replies (23) Good night (6092) Bad night (1659)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.

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  (814): I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green. http://tfl.nu/s063
  Replies (35) Good night (3017) Bad night (649)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.

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  (508): He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is. http://tfl.nu/qf8i
  Replies (8) Good night (782) Bad night (1476)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me

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  (973): An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me http://tfl.nu/o6hs
  Replies (7) Good night (711) Bad night (352)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.

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  (608): Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening. http://tfl.nu/bdxc
  Replies (7) Good night (1670) Bad night (317)
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  (707): View more from California

  I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..

  (707): View more from California

  WOAH TOO HIGH

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  (707): I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted.. (707): WOAH TOO HIGH http://tfl.nu/n7qo
  Replies (3) Good night (916) Bad night (350)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.

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  (715): Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk. http://tfl.nu/dnee
  Replies (2) Good night (231) Bad night (746)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.

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  (615): No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day. http://tfl.nu/93vi
  Replies (3) Good night (578) Bad night (492)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises

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  (519): Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises http://tfl.nu/10cn
  Replies (1) Good night (585) Bad night (467)

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