Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(202): View more from Washington, DC

Do ugly people know they are ugly?

(1-202): View more from Washington, DC

The quiet ones do.

Fav 25 2545 2751
share tweet
(845): View more from New York

I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.

(845): View more from New York

Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.

Fav 18 7686 1296
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(518): View more from New York

apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party

Fav 17 6307 1008
share tweet
(631): View more from New York

I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.

Fav 27 4742 924
share tweet
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(248): View more from Michigan

I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.

Fav 12 7460 1328
share tweet
(857): View more from Massachusetts

So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?

Fav 6 1950 4079
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(303): View more from Colorado

i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas

Fav 56 5273 1835
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(651): View more from Minnesota

The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.

Fav 24 1376 831
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(217): View more from Illinois

But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.

Fav 4 719 441
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT