just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
