in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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