The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
