38 yer olds are good kisserssss
its not stalking. its research.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
