just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
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