he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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