Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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